How to help your dog with separation anxiety in a London flat. Why big cities add extra challenge.
- Skaiste S.
- Sep 2
- 5 min read
Picture this: you live in a cosy London flat. Neighbours on both sides. You grab your keys, step out for a 15-minute run to Tesco… and within seconds your dog is howling like the world is ending.
Cue the guilt, the stress, and the side-eye from your downstairs neighbour who definitely heard everything.
Sounds familiar? You’re not alone and neither is your dog. Separation anxiety is tough anywhere, but in cities like London it can feel extra challenging.
Why London life makes separation anxiety harder
I'm taking London because the majority of my clientele are there which inevitably means I have a chance to see the challenges people face there every day. But let's be honest, same challenges are faced by dog guardians in any bigger city.
Thin walls, big stress:
Every bark, whine, or scratch echoes through the building. That adds pressure on you (and makes the problem feel 10x heavier. If you're lucky your neighbours don't mind but we've seen tens of cases where people are ready to move out due to tons of sticky notes on the door from the community. It's valid and understandable. Not less stressful, however.
Long commutes & unpredictable schedules:
London jobs often mean you’re out of the house longer than you’d like. Dogs with separation anxiety, unfortunately, don't have the capacity to "just wait extra 30 minutes". Even if your dog can stay alone for some time between your dog walker leaving and you coming back, usually it still means no room for deviations.
What doesn’t work (even though you’ve probably tried it)
Puzzle toys, Kongs or long-lasting chews:
They're great for daily enrichment and making those brains work, but they don’t cure panic. Most dogs with separation anxiety won’t even touch them once you leave. Those who do, will quickly eat whatever is left while already in panic and set off the second food runs out. It might seem like a temporary solution but it does not work long-term. I discuss why we don't use food in SA treatment in this article.
More exercise:
I'm all here for spending more quality time with your dog: longer walks, agility, hoopers, other sports - you name it. Whatever helps to build a nice relationship and have fun. It isn't the cure for separation anxiety. In very few cases it is, in fact, boredom or lack of exercise. If it's a panic and fear based SA, you can spend all the hours in the morning giving your dog extra walks, they will still panic when you leave.
“Let them cry it out”:
Might be the worst advice you were given. Ever. Fear is not something we can easily just overcome. Same applies to our dogs. Once they start panicking, leaving them in that state just means they are getting more and more freaked out with every bark they take. This is why you will also notice the silent whines turning into barks, into howling and, potentially, into home destruction.
What actually works if you want to help your dog with separation anxiety
Gradual exposure. It's a very scientific term to say that we are teaching your dog that home alone time is not scary. It's a game. A game parents play regularly and they always come back. We split these into short sessions with clear instructions for you and manageable for the dog.
Why remote training works so well for treating separation anxiety in dogs
People often ask: “But don’t you need to come to my flat?”. I get it. It's not how we are used dog trainers to work. You strongly believe that your case is different and the trainer really needs to see your dog "in action.
The truth is, to help with your dog's separation anxiety, a good coach won't need to bring your dog to the state of panic just to see how they react. We've seen it, believe me. Hundreds of times. However, here are some other reasons why separation anxiety is better treated remotely instead of in-person:
I can see real behaviour, not “trainer effect.”:
I don't want your dog to learn that a picture of a trainer hiding behind the corner is when staying alone is okay, but when the trainer is not there - back to the panic zone.
I would literally be coming to your house to leave it:
Remember, we are teaching your dog to stay home alone, so in order to do that we... need to leave them alone. There is no need for a trainer to physically stand behind the door to instruct you to leave the house and then come back.
I can utilise the video to see even the smallest tells of stress in your dog's body language:
Separation anxiety treatment is working with data. Video footage allows us too collect this data. We can stop, slow it down and more to see even the tiniest dog body language signs that tell us your dog is under stress. If we can recognise stress, we can make necessary amendments to make sure you see improvements and are not stuck at the same minute mark for months.
Fits busy London schedules (no travel, no fuss):
All you have to do is open the app, complete your daily training exercise, send a cheeky update and you're done.
You can actually progress:
Normally, you would have an in-person session (which, let's admit, in separation anxiety case would end up you and the trainer talking for an hour anyways), get some homework and be left to continue alone until the next session. I can assure you now, there will be loads of questions, loads of "am I doing this right?", loads of "what do I do now?" or "is this how it's supposed to be?". When you can't get those needed answers, you start improvising, hoping to clear things up in your next session. Bad news: there's not much room for improvisation in separation anxiety training.
That’s why so many of my clients are London based or reside all over Europe: online coaching fits perfectly with busy city lives and it actually brings results. Look at some of our chispa dogs going from breaking doors to hours happy home alone.
Final thoughts...
Your dog's separation anxiety, especially in a London flat, feels overwhelming: neighbours complaining, dog panicking, barking, destroying the house, you stuck at home, not being able to attend a gym class or simply go to the supermarket.
You don’t need to keep living like this.
With the right plan, consistency and support your dog and you can get some freedom back.
Ready to start?
Not ready yet?
Grab my free guide “The First 7 Days of Separation Anxiety Training” .
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